Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/11-celebs-who-have-joined-elons-america-party/

https://babylonbee.com/news/11-celebs-who-have-joined-elons-america-party

A new chapter in history was written last week, as Elon Musk formed the America Party as a foil to the Republican-Democratic "uniparty" system. Some of the big names who have already jumped on board may surprise you.

https://babylonbee.com/news/11-celebs-who-have-joined-elons-america-party/

https://babylonbee.com/news/11-celebs-who-have-joined-elons-america-party

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/ads-briefly-interrupted-by-mobile-game/

https://babylonbee.com/news/ads-briefly-interrupted-by-mobile-game

RANCHO CUCAMONGA, CA — Local man Gary Nielson was having a great time on his phone, until the ads he was watching were briefly yet rudely interrupted by the mobile game "Tetris Blast."

https://babylonbee.com/news/ads-briefly-interrupted-by-mobile-game/

https://babylonbee.com/news/ads-briefly-interrupted-by-mobile-game

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/mans-christian-love-for-humanity-shattered-by-trip-to-the-airport/

https://babylonbee.com/news/mans-christian-love-for-humanity-shattered-by-trip-to-the-airport

CHICAGO, IL — The world around a local man seemed to grow even colder and dimmer as he expressed feeling that his Christian love for humanity had been shattered after he took a trip to the airport.

https://babylonbee.com/news/mans-christian-love-for-humanity-shattered-by-trip-to-the-airport/

https://babylonbee.com/news/mans-christian-love-for-humanity-shattered-by-trip-to-the-airport

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/biblical-prophecy-fulfilled-chick-fil-a-opens-new-temple-mount-location/

https://babylonbee.com/news/biblical-prophecy-fulfilled-chick-fil-a-opens-new-temple-mount-location

JERUSALEM — In a possible fulfillment of Biblical prophecy, Chick-fil-A has just opened a new location on the Temple Mount.

https://babylonbee.com/news/biblical-prophecy-fulfilled-chick-fil-a-opens-new-temple-mount-location/

https://babylonbee.com/news/biblical-prophecy-fulfilled-chick-fil-a-opens-new-temple-mount-location

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/pam-bondi-confirms-ark-of-the-covenant-sitting-on-her-desk-waiting-to-be-reviewed/

https://babylonbee.com/news/pam-bondi-confirms-ark-of-the-covenant-sitting-on-her-desk-waiting-to-be-reviewed

WASHINGTON, D.C. — As the world waited with bated breath to learn about the contents of the ancient biblical artifact, U.S. Attorney General Pam Pondi made an official statement confirming that the Ark of the Covenant was sitting on her desk waiting to be reviewed.

https://babylonbee.com/news/pam-bondi-confirms-ark-of-the-covenant-sitting-on-her-desk-waiting-to-be-reviewed/

https://babylonbee.com/news/pam-bondi-confirms-ark-of-the-covenant-sitting-on-her-desk-waiting-to-be-reviewed

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-installs-animatronic-district-judge-to-block-animatronic-trump/

https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-installs-animatronic-district-judge-to-block-animatronic-trump

ORLANDO, FL — Disney World's Hall of Presidents was updated over the weekend to include a new animatronic district judge to block all actions by its animatronic President Trump.

https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-installs-animatronic-district-judge-to-block-animatronic-trump/

https://babylonbee.com/news/disney-installs-animatronic-district-judge-to-block-animatronic-trump

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/iranian-president-worried-this-tucker-guy-might-be-a-little-extreme/

https://babylonbee.com/news/iranian-president-worried-this-tucker-guy-might-be-a-little-extreme

TEHRAN — Sources close to the regime reported that Iranian President Masoud Pezeshkian expressed worry during his highly publicized X interview that this Tucker Carlson guy might be a little extreme.

https://babylonbee.com/news/iranian-president-worried-this-tucker-guy-might-be-a-little-extreme/

https://babylonbee.com/news/iranian-president-worried-this-tucker-guy-might-be-a-little-extreme

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/thats-neat-buddy-says-dad-understanding-nothing-of-what-his-kid-just-told-him-about-roblox/

https://babylonbee.com/news/thats-neat-buddy-says-dad-understanding-nothing-of-what-his-kid-just-told-him-about-roblox

Local dad Sam Moore offered his son several vague affirmations this morning, understanding absolutely nothing of what he was being told about Roblox.

https://babylonbee.com/news/thats-neat-buddy-says-dad-understanding-nothing-of-what-his-kid-just-told-him-about-roblox/

https://babylonbee.com/news/thats-neat-buddy-says-dad-understanding-nothing-of-what-his-kid-just-told-him-about-roblox

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/nation-wondering-if-government-gonna-bankrupt-us-anyway-if-maybe-they-could-buy-us-all-a-switch-2/

https://babylonbee.com/news/nation-wondering-if-government-gonna-bankrupt-us-anyway-if-maybe-they-could-buy-us-all-a-switch-2

U.S. — Citizens have begun wondering if the federal government couldn't just buy everyone a Switch 2 if it's already intent on bankrupting us anyways.

https://babylonbee.com/news/nation-wondering-if-government-gonna-bankrupt-us-anyway-if-maybe-they-could-buy-us-all-a-switch-2/

https://babylonbee.com/news/nation-wondering-if-government-gonna-bankrupt-us-anyway-if-maybe-they-could-buy-us-all-a-switch-2

Posted by Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/thyroid-sick-of-getting-blamed-for-all-of-womans-character-flaws/

https://babylonbee.com/news/thyroid-sick-of-getting-blamed-for-all-of-womans-character-flaws

FRITCH, TX — Local woman Denise Stanton's thyroid gland has gotten increasingly fed up with getting blamed for all of her shortcomings.

https://babylonbee.com/news/thyroid-sick-of-getting-blamed-for-all-of-womans-character-flaws/

https://babylonbee.com/news/thyroid-sick-of-getting-blamed-for-all-of-womans-character-flaws